Ask a Douche Bag with Kriss Angel

Q: I love you Mind Freak. And I love magic–sooooo much. Ever since I was little, I’ve been fascinated by magic. And I’ve totally always wanted to be a magician. At first I was thinking maybe I’d be the legs in the “Saw a woman in half” trick. But my mom always tells me how pretty I am, so now I might want to be the head. I don’t know what to do Mind Freak. How can I make my dream come true and be a magician like you?

–Legs or Head

A: How many fucking times do I have to say this: I’m an illusionist not a fucking magician! Get it straight you unless fucking twat! God, I hate you. I swear, the next person who calls me a magician… I don’t know…
I actually will saw them in half. But for real, not like that bullshit trick you based your stupid life’s dream on.

Fuck off,
Mind Freak

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